Why Does Holiday Introspection Matter?

by Peggy Sue Skipper

     The holiday season is upon us and it can be a wonderful, yet difficult, time for many. Most of us are around extended family more during this time of the year than any other—therein lies the “wonderful and yet difficult” circumstances. Then there are those that have little or no family to speak of and find themselves alone amidst hoards of people who seem to have so much to do and so many places to go.

     It is a good time of year for introspection—after all The New Year is right around the corner and most of us have a few resolutions each year whether we admit it or not. Resolutions come from introspection—the process of looking objectively at our own life and determining what we can do to make it better. But just knowing what we “should do” doesn’t make it happen. Many New Year’s resolutions go by the wayside before the end of January. Why is that?

     Perhaps our introspection process is too superficial. It is not an easy task for one to look objectively inward. We see ourselves through filters of our subconscious training and those filters are very powerful and often skew our talents and challenges beyond recognition. It takes a true inward journey to see the truth about ourselves. An inward journey requires quiet time to reflect, meditate and look at ourselves honestly and without emotion. Most of us humans need years of practice to truly be able to take an inward journey. And, to know where to start that journey.

     One of the things I love about doing intuitive work with people is giving them the information about their “core self”—strengths and challenges—to give them a place to start their inward journey. When someone sits in my office and says, “No one has ever told me I was “good at that” before.” Sometimes I can really feel a shift happen for them through new awareness. What an incredible feeling that is for me.

     When it comes to the “challenges” part of our individual packages it is important—especially at this time of year—to remember that our families are almost always our best teachers for our life Lessons. Of course they are—if they were strangers on the street we could easily avoid them and not have to work on our “life lessons” at all. So this year if you are one of those that spends more time with your extended family through the holiday season use that time wisely. Which of your family members really push your buttons? If you can remove the emotion from the situations and truly look at them and silently say to them, “Thanks! You are really doing a good job as my teacher right now!” And remember to smile when you silently say those words. I promise you will be truly amazed at the results.

     The next step is to look at what button is being pushed by that person because therein lies the answer to at least one of your life lessons. It is never about the button pusher but the button itself. That button deserves some of your deep introspective time. It will be time well invested. It can be a marvelous game figuring all this out once you get the hang of it.

     The next step to useful introspection is “gratitude”. Say aloud how grateful you are for that button pushing teacher in your life. Even if you can’t really mean it the first few times you say it—say it anyway. Say it out loud and then even louder.  Even with no one there to hear you it will shift things for you. If you can get to the point you can tell the person—to their face—how grateful you are for them—even better!

     The most difficult part of the process for most of us is truly “owning up” to the parts of ourselves that we don’t much admire. The part that can be selfish or ungrateful or mean spirited or whatever we find not very attractive. We all have a dark side and not looking at it doesn’t make it go away.

     I have marveled at a few people I have met that seem to have no talent for or even need for introspection at all. They just go through life with a focus on what they want and do not seem to know or care that people are often crushed in the wake of their progress. Perhaps there is something to be said for that approach but it requires a very superficial outlook on life and I have to believe that these people will wake up one day and find themselves truly alone.

     So go ahead and do a little introspection during this holiday season—thank a teacher or two—and if you are feeling really brave go ahead with a resolution for The New Year!

                                                                                —30—