How Do Your Relationships Affect You?

by Yamini Bhatt

The relationship you have with objects and foods and weather and transportation and with people all reflect the relationship you have with yourself.       —Louise Hay

     We have relationships with everything. All healing is based on relationships. The most important relationship of all is the one with yourself and your soul. All people and the entire world around us reflect our consciousness. What’s this consciousness made up of? Our consciousness is sum total of our own thoughts, beliefs, perceptions and judgments of self. What others reflect back to us is our own inner programming that says we are incomplete; that we are somehow flawed, bad, wrong or ineffective.

     These self-negating thoughts and inner feelings are projected out in many ways in our relationships with others by being judgmental, critical, condemning and unforgiving. It is true that what we see, condemn and criticize in others is a mirror image of who we are and what we do not like about ourselves. We wouldn’t be able to identify those traits in others if we didn’t have some aspects of those traits within us.

     The fastest route to healing and experiencing happiness in a relationship is to forgive completely and limitlessly. One may ask: what is there to forgive? There are hundreds, if not thousands of inner patterns and feelings of inadequacy, guilt, self-hatred and betrayal to name a few. Some of the most powerful and harmful feelings get lodged in the right hemispheres of the brain. And regardless of the source of these patterns, they must be forgiven and released from the very neurons of the brain for the body and mind to experience complete wholeness and healing.  

Fear, doubt, anxiety, anger and resentment pull down the cells of the body, shock the nervous system, and are the causes of disease and disaster. Happiness and health must be earned by absolute control of the emotional nature.     —Florence Scovel Shinn

     Awareness is the first key to making changes. It is very important that you become aware of all of your relationships in your life and what negative charge you have on each one. The true healing happens in our consciousness. We must release any reactive negative energies held in our consciousness. It simply hinders our success and prosperity.

Understanding Soul Relationships

     In Spiritual Response Therapy (SRT), we learn that every soul chooses its life process, planet, country, gender, nationality, birth family, and significant relationships to fulfill its journey and purpose. For example, why did you pick a particular father or mother? What if there are soul relationships that play a part in our choice of family and significant partners? In his book Soul Recreation, Robert E. Detzler, the founder of Spiritual Response Therapy discusses possible soul connections that lead to positive challenges and in some case, limitations.

     The basic soul relationships are twin flame, flame mate and soul mate. A soul mate relationship, for example, may equate in terms of cousins, aunts, uncles, best friends and other extended family members. Flame mate relationships are closer than a soul mate relationship and may include relationships in the immediate family like brothers, sisters, mother and father. Twin flame soul connections can be the most challenging or most rewarding relationships. Twin flame relationships usually include more spousal relationships.

     Soul relationships have a basic purpose that they share in their incarnations. Finding a soul connection is very helpful in resolving relationship conflicts and bringing greater and permanent healing in our everyday relationships.

Healing Soul Relationships

     Working with many clients and working through my own relationship challenges, I have realized that the soul is ultimately in charge of its own healing. Nothing happens that is not planned or allowed by our soul. As a divine being creating our own reality, we cannot become victims. Relationship challenges present many opportunities for the soul for growth and healing. There are lessons of love, healing and forgiveness involved. Often times all perceived “negative” circumstances are necessary for soul’s learning and growth.

     The foundation for any relationship to work is “Responsibility”—the ability to respond to that which is needed by another without undermining the responsibility that is his or hers. You can analyze and try to understand each relationship but all you need to have is willingness to withdraw your ego projections and commitment to release repeating patterns of anger, fear, resentment and guilt.

     With SRT healing method, soul relationships and relationship patterns are identified. Negative, limiting and unresolved energies carried over by each soul are cleared. This process releases old pains, opens the heart and brings you readiness and wholeness. It allows you to create new positive patterns so you can experience greater harmony and positive growth with each other. In truth, Love attracts Love. For more information on SRT or Soul Clearing session visit The Riddham Spiritual Center.


Inspired action:

     Look at where you are in your life at this moment. The four areas I recommend you to check are – Health, Wealth/career, Love/Relationships and Self Expression/Creativity. What is holding you back or out of harmony in these areas? Do you like what you see? To change your world you must change your consciousness. Make a list of everyone who could possibly trigger even a trace of irritation in you. Look at the hurt, the anger, the disappointment, the resentment, the judgment- and understand that you are condemning yourself. With clear intention to heal, release it to the light of SPIRIT to be loved, forgiven and healed. This enables you to give up resentment toward everyone and restore harmony in your world. If you are led to take a specific action like doing affirmations or meditations or call them or write to them then do it.

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For more information about the Riddham Spiritual Center please check our her website.

Yamini Bhatt also writes a column for The New Era Times called Birthing the New You.